bakabaka | for zelda

for zelda

[ Gumdrops.

The gumdrop fae dances above their heads, the bells at it collar chiming happily as it twirls, solidifying its enchantment. Instead of being free to continue on their way to the smithy and the much-needed warmth of its forge, they now stand together, caught. As lucky as they are to be trapped in an area that is relatively private along the side of a building, it is still outdoors. Fine, powdery snow falls about them, hoth dusting her hair and outerwear and quieting all of their surroundings. It is only them.

Somnus is aware of what the mistletoe-gumdrop means and what the enchantment asks. Still, he tests the strength of the barrier about them, lifting a hand in a loose fist and rapping the back of his knuckles against an invisible wall. Slowly, he lowers his arm back to his side, allowing it to disappear beneath his heavy cloak. One would think that in all of his years in this dream realm, he would have become an expert in avoiding these seasonal slugs-like creatures; and, for the past few seasons, he had managed to escape the devious fae's entrapments. Unfortunately for him, his luck seems to have finally run out, and who else is trapped with him but a certain young, Hylian woman.

At last, he turns his head to regard her. His gaze holds hers evenly, but ever briefly does it falter-- flitting down to her lips-- then back up. ]

Daughter of Hyrule.

[ There is hesitance and urgency, stiff and polite remorse for their circumstance betrayed in his voice. It is a tone he swiftly corrects, beginning again as formality smooths over his tone. ]

We may wait, if you wish.

[ It's cold, but the option to simply wait out the gumdrop is there. It seems the last thing he desires is for her to feel uncomfortable.

(The gumdrop, meanwhile, begins to coo "kisssss", "you gotta kissss", above them, humming along to a wintertime carol.) ]

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[ (It's something so small, just the sound of her name in his voice, but it makes her stomach fill with butterflies. It's like she's hearing something illicit, something he shouldn't be saying to her --and in a way, she is. But he's saying it anyway and her breath is catching in her throat as he lifts her hands and places a tender kiss upon each of her fingers...)

As he speaks, her gentle countenance shifts into something... not quite disbelieving, but incredulous. Here is Somnus, someone she has always known to be proud, regal, unflinching in his confidence and his authority, someone she has long looked up to as an example of how a sovereign should act, whose strength and conviction Zelda has strived to emulate herself-- and he speaks as though he is none of these things, as if he is somehow unworthy of her...

Her forehead crinkles, her expression quizzical. He is inspired by her courage? But it's been the other way around for as long as she's known him. She has always sought his strength, his guidance, in her times of weakness, and has never been able to give him anything in return. And here he is, speaking as though he has nothing to offer her? It's almost laughable...

But she doesn't, even though her lips are twisted up in something that resembles a smile, an air of incredulousness and just a hint of amusement about her. She makes a noise of affirmation, a soft hum, ] This is how I truly feel, yes.

[ She tilts her head into his caress. ] I do not understand what pain a lack of land could bring.

[ As she leans her head into his touch, his eyes flit to the smile upon her lips. He supposes a lack of land and a kingdom do not mean much in a world away from either of their demesne... And if she is as stubborn in love as she is in all other things, then whether or not he has anything to his name won't dissuade her.

He could hold her like this forever, palm against her soft skin with some strands of her hair caught between his fingers, gazing over the loveliness of her visage. He'd wanted to for-- who knows how long, even before he'd been consciously aware of the desire.

Oh, but he'd been always aware of her softness. Each time he'd carried her, each time they had shared a dance. It would have been inappropriate then to have his touch or gaze to linger, but privately, he had allowed himself to admire her smile each and every time. ]

The pain I speak of is for when we must eventually part. [ And they will, because that is the nature of the dream. Still, she's already made her case that being with some is worth whatever heartache might occur afterward, and as he's said, he can only follow her courage. ] But until then...

I will court you. Properly.

[ No havsies with this guy. ]

[ A little grimace briefly flickers across her features at his reminder of their inevitable parting. Right, of course, that pain. Despite how brave she is trying to be in the face of it --and she truly believes the time they share together will be worth it-- she does fear that day... especially for whoever is left behind.

But for now, she roughly shoves that fear aside. If she lets it linger in her mind, anxiety will bore down into her heart like the weed it is and choke out everything else growing there. And she doesn't want to feel that way. There are ways to feel, new and scary and somehow exciting--

Like the way her heart stutters when he mentions courting. ]

C-Court me? [ Her eyes widen with surprise, as if she hadn't even considered the possibility that he would want to court her.

Because she hadn't. She has never considered the possibility that someone would want to court her-- not solely because she has never met anyone who caught her interest that way, but because courting feels like a relic of the past, something that fell with her father's Hyrule during the Calamity. Zelda's Hyrule, the one she has only barely begun to rebuild, is so new that it still lacks a permanent seat of government. How does one properly court a princess who rules from a log fort? ]

I shall have to ask you to guide me in that, then. [ She admits with a bashful smile. ] You are the first to ask that of me... and it has been quite some time since my etiquette lessons.

[ But though she looks embarrassed, she's clearly not ashamed. Rather, she's almost... giddy at the prospect of sharing another first with him. With any luck, they will have enough time in this dream to share many more. ]

[ Oh, he's serious. If he's going to enter into a relationship with someone as wonderful as her, he has to give his all and do his damnedest to provide her with all that she deserves from a relationship. Read, what he believes she, as both princess and descendant of a goddess, should have. Which means making this a formal affair. To-- what is the modern term?-- merely date her would not be enough. No, he must show that he is dedicated.

(And focusing upon that dedication may also help him distract himself from the fear of losing her.)

Besides they've... already shared more than a handful of kisses. And she'd seen him in quite an obvious, aroused state. Never would he want her to have the impression that he is simply using her for his sexual gratification.

Ah, but her smile once again breaks him from his thoughts. ] It has been some time for me, as well.

[ So he volunteers, but he quickly adds: ] I shall do my utmost to provide all for this courtship, as both a princess and one of divine blood deserves.

[ Wow, he is completely serious about this courting thing. Which, considering this is Somnus, really shouldn't surprise her at all. Of course he would want to pursue this relationship with all the formality that their stations demand... even though those stations aren't particularly relevant in this dream world. That's how he is, how a king ought to be.

But it also feels a little... overmuch to Zelda. Especially when he mentions her divine heritage, as though that means he should be even more formal and more reverent in courting her. There it is again, the way he elevates her so far above him, and the feeling sits unpleasantly in her gut. One does not love a goddess as one loves a woman. ]

This need not be overly formal. [ She squeezes his hand softly, the one she is still holding cupped between hers. A formal courtship would, in some ways, be like taking several steps backwards. After all, a proper suitor does not pin a lady against a barrier, does not fill her mouth with his tongue, does not lift her leg against his side. And a lady, a proper princess, should not wish him to do all those things again. ]

[ A proper suitor would offer her gold, gems, and not least of all flowers. It is a good thing he works as a smithy and has established a steady supply of precious metals and stones to his forge so that he may provide. As for the flowers, he'll have to work on that.

A proper suitor would also not have been so carried away by a woman's tongue and hands. He would have given said gems, gold, and flowers first. Yet minutes ago he had himself to his desires... and he cannot deny he wants so much more. His conduct is unbecoming of a king.

And he fears that she doesn't know the kind of power she holds over him now. How distracting she is.

So her response causes a brow to arch slightly. ]

How so?

[ (Nope, she hasn't the slightest idea the power she has over him now. And that naivete just might make it worse.)

Oh Goddess, she's not going to have to say it outright, is she? Because this is all very new to her and she's not entirely sure how to put that-- what happened between them in the barrier-- into words. ]

Well, formal courtships tend to be... long. At least, in Hyrule. As I was taught, that is.

[ A line forms in her brow as she fumbles along. ]

And we have, rather... not long. Here. Possibly.

[ Truly articulate.

Come on, Zelda, just spit it out. ]

I simply feel it would be rather, ah, counterintuitive [ what a terrible word choice ] -to adhere to the traditional level of propriety normally expected of those early in courtship.

[ All of which is a horrible way to say that she doesn't want to have to wait months to kiss him again. ]

[ Yes, in many different ways, a formal courtship would be taking multiple steps back-- which is why, in his mind, it is safer. Safer to not to fling oneself into something she is new at, and, arguably, him, too. (Not him not realizing that she's handling this far better than him.)

But.

She is also not wrong. He, too, would like to... have the opportunity to taste her lips again. In his time, courting a noblewoman of a proper family would take some time, but not overly much-- lengthier, more rigid courtships became far more expected in later centuries. Still, the expectation was that the man would not go so far as to offend the woman in it. ]

You would not feel dishonored?

[ As soon as he says this, though, his lips press together.

A part of him wants to believe that he has not dishonored her in any way for being inappropriate. She did say she enjoyed it, that she would like more. Is that dishonoring her? Here she stands, smiling at him, hopeful, bashful. ]

Dishonored?

[ The word comes out with such overt surprise that it's immediately obvious that this is the first time she is even considering it.

Right, that's probably how she should be feeling about what happened-- not just ashamed of herself for getting caught up in her own desires, but upset with him for doing the same. As if he had taken advantage of her.

She hasn't thought about these things since she was a teenager, struggling under the weight of all the expectations the kingdom placed upon its crown princess. Maybe back then, Zelda would have felt-- maybe not dishonored, but conflicted about indulging in sexual pleasure with a man. The Princess of Hyrule was already looked upon as a failure by many in court because of her inability to awaken her sacred power; engaging in licentious behavior would have worsened her standing even further.

But that was a century ago-- a different Hyrule, a different Zelda, a different lifetime. Sometimes she doesn't even realize how much things have changed until she looks back on those days before the Calamity. How much she has changed.

Zelda shakes her head. ] I would not, no.

[ "I would not, no."

A brow lifts, then lowers. She will certainly see the gears slowly turn in his mind as he takes all of this into account. This, meaning--

She wants...

She would be okay with...

....indulging. Indulging in more of what they just shared, should the mood strike. By the way his jaw goes slightly slack, one would think this is the first time a woman has been so forward with him.

(It's not. It's just that it's been quite a long time.) ]

Very [ His mouth feels dry. ] well. Our courtship need not be overly formal. [ Yet he's declaring this in a very firm and formal way, as if to make up for the total lack of formality the actual subject brings. ]

[ No need to be overly formal, and yet his tone is as rigid as ever. It's... it's actually kind of funny. It almost seems like he's a little nervous.

The thought makes her brow crinkle, her lips twist upward into an amused little grin, and she chuckles softly. ]

Perhaps informality shall require a little bit of practice.

[ A soft jab at his expense, probably the first she has ever made.

And a bit frightening to make, if she's being honest with herself. Even though she's inviting informality between them, the prospect is somewhat daunting. For as warm and friendly as she's always tried to be with Somnus, she has also consciously given him a respectful distance. If they are to court, if they are to love, Zelda would like to close that distance. ]

[ Her laughter is like bells, captivating him.

Practice with... informality. He sees the tease for what it is, and he takes no offense. And it's not as if he doesn't wish to be informal-- far from it, in fact. Allowing himself to be is another matter entirely. Not only has he grown up with the rigid structure overshadowing nobility, but the guilt and burden of his prophecy weigh on him, often stifling self-permittance to enjoy himself.

But he wants to try. He wants to be the reason for her smiles, her laughter. ]

Perhaps, in this, I should follow your lead. [ A bit of a switch, here. She'd followed his lead with the kiss. It's time to follow hers for... informality.

...

Informality. ]

I would still escort you home, however.

[ Because that's a formality he wants to do! Arm and arm! Not as acquaintances, but as a true couple where he gets to hold her a little closer to him! ]

[ He wants to follow her lead? That's not something she expected to hear. And yet, it makes her brighten, eyes sparkling with that curiosity and intrigue so characteristic of her. What will that require of her, to coax him to drop some of that rigidness he always carries about himself? No small amount of bravery, that's for certain.

But before her mind can wander too far, he pulls her attention back to the present.

At the mention of home, it occurs to Zelda that she has no idea what time it is. She breaks from his gaze and looks around out of habit for a window to tell the time of day. The sun was already well on its way to the horizon when they were finally freed from the barrier; with the time they've been at the smithy, it has probably set by now. ]

It is quite late by now, isn't it?

[ She almost declines his escort out of habit --Reverein is a safe place that the princess doesn't need protection-- but her brain catches up just in time. ] I would most appreciate your company, thank you.

Edited 2024-03-18 20:58 (UTC)

[ He moves away, fetching her coat. It's fortunately dry by now. Instead of handing it to her, he holds it open to place it on her.

Somnus reaches for the scarf to do the same, only stopping short when he turns to face her, gaze lowering from her eyes to the mark at the side of her neck. It's only been... what, an hour? Perhaps less? And already it feels like a lifetime ago that he pressed his mouth to her skin.

This is going to be a problem, if he's yearning this much for more. ]

You may need to wear this for the next day or so.

[ Fortunate, that it's cold out. Also he doesn't want to be the cause for any embarrassment! (While simultaneously reveling in the fact that he marked her.) ]

[ Zelda extends a hand to accept her coat from Somnus-- but oh, nope he's placing it over her shoulders instead. Here comes a shy little blush to her cheeks, which she obscures by lowering her head as she pulls her arms through the sleeves of her coat.

When she lifts her head again and sees he has her scarf, she straightens up and smiles, waiting for him to drape it around her neck... And seeing, instead, his gaze flick briefly lower.

But for the remark that follows, she probably would have just ignored it, but the oddness of that suggestion makes one curious eyebrow go up. ]

I suspect I shall need it a fair bit longer than that. We've quite some time before the first spring thaw.

[ Unfortunately, if Somnus was trying to be subtle, it worked a little too well, because any insinuation that Zelda might have other reasons to need a scarf has sailed swiftly over her head. When she gets home, the scarf will come off, as it always does, and her sharp-eyed housemate will undoubtedly spot the mark on her neck. ]

[ Yes, he's noticing that he must be more direct. Perhaps she is not aware. Or perhaps she is that inexperienced that she doesn't know how a firmer, passionate kiss might discolor the skin. Regardless, he must clarify if only for the sake of their discretion.

(Which is probably something they should talk about, if they are to let others know they are in a relationship.) ]

I did mean... because of the mark. [ He raises his hand to press his palm against the side of his neck as if to indicate the mark on her own. ]

Here, from earlier. [ He offers more clarification, but it seems he's really ~~awkward~~ ~~stiff~~ unwilling to say the actual word "kiss". ]

[ (It's a little of column a, a little of column b.) ]

Mark?

[ She watches him with confusion at first, brows knitting together.

Then she mimicks his motion, lifting one hand and pressing her palm against her neck (unwittingly covering the mark as she does).

A mark? On her neck? Why would there be--

--And suddenly she's flashing back to that moment inside the barrier, when she felt him tug down her scarf and press his lips against her neck, firm, hot, and deliberate. A sudden rush of warmth blossoms in her stomach at the very fresh memory of urgent kisses, heady moans, and the trail of his tongue along her flushed skin.

Oh, that... that left a mark. On her neck.

She's still looking at Somnus as realization dawns, and when she realizes that, her face floods with color.

He...

Left a mark. On her neck.

And something tells her it wasn't an accident. ]

[ He has the privilege of watching her expression as realization dawns on her. A blush blooms across her cheeks, and it's the loveliest shade of rose he's ever seen. But as lovely as it is...

It had been a poor judgment on his part to leave a mark while overtaken with passion. This would not be as much of a problem if she lived alone, but knowing that she does? There might be questions, and he is uncertain if she wishes to reveal to others that they are (informally) courting. ]

It was shortsighted to-- [ Kiss her skin in a way that he'd hope she'll think of him every time she sees it in a mirror-- ] leave a blemish. Fret not, it will fade in two days or so. I pray it shall not distress you too much.

[ Ah, so it definitely wasn't an accident. He deliberately kissed her like that, knowing it would leave a mark. Even though he said from the start that he would tell no one of their capture by the gumdrop and what they would need to do to be free. Even then, he still kissed her firmly enough to leave proof of their passion visible upon her for days afterwards. Proof that, by the way he speaks, anyone who sees it will easily guess its source.

For a moment, she looks like she might ask him why. Why kiss her like that, when he never intended for any of this to go beyond the barrier? But just thinking about this, the way his lips felt on her skin and the warm feeling that accompanies that memory-- she finds the answer without needing to ask the question.

Because they had both completely lost control. Because it felt so right in the moment. And even if she had known what he was doing at the time, she would have welcomed it anyway-- bravely, selfishly welcomed him to mark her with his lips, so that even after they parted, she would a reminder of the pleasure they shared.

And, even more selfishly, so that he would have the same reminder whenever he looked at her. ]

In truth, I don't mind it. [ Zelda rubs her neck self-consciously, the surprise in her blushing expression fading into a sheepish smile. Not only does she not mind, she's almost certainly going to stand in front of her bedroom mirror blushing and admiring it later tonight. ]

But... Link will notice. [ And here her expression turns apologetic, because she has a feeling that's what Somnus was getting at to begin with. ] And I do not wish to hide this from him.

[ But the trepidation in her voice is because she knows Somnus might not feel the same. Zelda knows how private he is. ]

[ ...Right. She is unwed, yes, but she already lives with another man. Her knight, someone she has known for years, if not decades.

Any other day, Somnus would approve on the font that she has someone in her residence to be ready and able to protect her at all times. Today, though, is different, because he'd just tasted her tongue and hooked her leg around his waist, two memories that are vividly dancing in his mind's eye.

Somnus is self-aware enough to know that envy is not a desirable trait, and that he's quite prone to it. He is not self-aware enough to stop it showing in his expression by way of a frown. ]

By all means, [ He says, voice lowering-- an overcorrection of trying to ease the edge of his tone. ] I leave showing it to him at your discretion.

[ This is approval on his part for her to "show" Link-- but not just because he's likely to see it anyway. NOPE THIS IS SOMNUS WANTING TO ESTABLISH DOMINANCE LIKE LOOK SHES MINE SORRY LINK IM SORRY HES AN ASS ]

[ What Zelda is looking for is something more along the lines of an assurance that it's fine to talk about their relationship publicly. (Even if "publicly" is only a select few people at the moment.) What she receives is the verbal equivalent of a dismissive shrug and a "do whatever you want."

Which she is not pleased by.

Why did this elicit such a sour response? In truth, it's always been at Zelda's discretion to tell Link, regardless of whether Somnus wants her to or not. She doesn't need his permission, nor is she asking for it. She had hoped, instead, to get a sense of his feelings on the prospect of sharing their relationship publicly. A scowl is hardly the reaction she was expecting. ]

Would you prefer I not? [ She holds his gaze, expectantly waiting for a more forthright response. His answer isn't going to stop her from telling Link, but it may impact how she goes about it. ] I hardly mean to go out and post banns, but I would like to know if you would prefer to keep things private.

[ For as shy and timid as Zelda feels right now, fumbling through this abrupt change in their relationship, she isn't one to meekly go along with things. She has always fought against the tide in life; love will be no different. ]

Edited (didn't like my original tag, so i rewrote some of it ) 2024-03-29 20:30 (UTC)

[ Although he meets her gaze evenly, his expression is the first to shift. The frown eases-- just a bit-- as he appears to think over his words. ]

I would prefer discretion.

[ Boy oh boy does he have some introspection to mull over late. First and foremost: yes, he is rather private person, but no, it's important that some others must know that she's with him! Particularly all the men close to her she seems to charm. (And why wouldn't they fall for her? She is lovely.) Somnus is well aware of these dueling views. ]

However, with your knight...

Indeed, he should know of us, lest he believes you are available for his own pursuit.

[ Oh he should have considered those words a lot more carefully before letting them out, because the phrase "available for his own pursuit" immediately catches Zelda's attention-- in a bad way.

One brow goes up, her lips drawing together in a thin line. It's not the implication that Link might harbor romantic feelings for her that bothers Zelda, oh no. It is the idea that she is "available" or "unavailable," like an item at market going out of stock. Like a prize. Or a conquest.

Zelda inhales through her nose, forcing herself to take a careful moment to pick her words. ]

I have never been "available" for Link's pursuit, nor anyone else's. [ "Including yours," her eyes say. Yes, she is his now, as he is hers. But she is not his, like a trophy he has won. ]

[ He opens his mouth, then upon noting her expression, promptly closes it. It's clear that she's taken issue with his wording...? ¿ ?

...

It takes him a moment, but he (kind of) gets it. ] I did not mean to imply-- [ He fumbles. He clears his throat. ]

You are certain he does not yearn for you?

[ Oh, she misinterpreted his words. Immediately, the sharpness vanishes from Zelda's expression. When one is a princess, one is accustomed to being treated more like a chess piece than a person. It certainly felt that way with her father in that last year before the Calamity.

But that is no excuse for jumping to conclusions. She lowers her gaze remorsefully, shaking her head. ]

Quite certain. [ Her tone is far softer. ] Link and I... we have known each other for many years now. He has been by my side ever since the Calamity, even after I released him from my service. Had he feelings for me, or I for him, they would have come to light by now.

I will not lie and claim that I do not love him, but that love is... different. [ She fidgets with her fingers, trying to think of how best to label her feelings for Link. ] I do not desire him. Not as I-- [ "Not as I desire you," but the words get stuck in her throat and she forces herself to hurry past them. ] Nor does he desire me.

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